Relationship Vicious Cycles

Some people find their work performance being impaired by Relationship Vicious Cycles.

What does that mean?

That an executive or professional finds themselves in a mutually destructive relationship. One which is in a deteriorating vicious cycle. A relationship that is getting worse and worse, more and more toxic because of the amplifying effects of the reactions of each party on the other.

Relationship Vicious Cycles do not start deliberately. They begin because of who the parties are. Once started the behaviours of one party bring out the worst behaviours in the other person, which in turn triggers the emergence of even worse behaviours… and so on.

Rarely is any one party to blame. In fact, to each party their behaviour is an entirely reasonable reaction to what they see as unreasonable provocation. That adds to the sense of being wronged which each party experiences.

Rarely can people in a relationship vicious cycle understand what has started it. Or what perpetuates it. Indeed, this observation is often made by friends, too: “They are both lovely people, yet when they are together it is toxic. I don’t know why.”

If you have ever been in or witnessed someone in a Relationship Vicious Cycle, you will know how much it impairs the other areas of  your/their live/s. Work performance suffers… and that’s just the start of a long list of increasing damage.

If you are experiencing a Relationship Vicious Cycle you might want to ask yourself this: how much is this costing you, in bad feeling, in impaired motivation, in knock-on effects, in reduced morale… ? What will your life be like in one year, two years, five years if you allow this situation to continue?

If you are experiencing a Relationship Vicious Cycle and wish to break that cycle, or even better, convert it in to a relationship virtuous cycle, call Dr Nigel MacLennan to make an appointment on

Copyright 2018 Dr Nigel MacLennan